Stranger Danger?

Stranger Danger?

I remember sitting in a restaurant in Italy and a man had invited himself to come and join me. I felt uncomfortable and at that time I didn’t know how to ask him to leave without feeling rude. I didn’t know then what I know now and what I'm going to share with you. Probably one of the most important things I'm going to spend my time writing all day, and that's how important it is to how to stay in your growth zone in a healthy way and keep yourself feeling safe in this beautiful adventure we call life. 

Back at that restaurant in Italy, when he stood up to go to the bathroom I called the waitress over and told her I did not know him and if I needed help could I give her a signal so she could come and assist me to get out of the situation.

She was amazing and agreed immediately. After I had made contact with this lady, I felt substantially better. I felt safe. I felt in my element and ready to make a new friend. After spending time with him over dinner I realized really, he was completely harmless. Later the man asked me if I wanted to go to a different bar with him up the road, it was dark, I was in a foreign country as a solo female traveler and even though his intentions didn't feel dangerous – I declined.

Being able to make choices for ourselves like this is not only helpful, it’s essential. Practicing every day what you feel comfortable with, where you can grow and what is a no for you will make your quality of life exponentially better.

At The Kindness Hub, we believe ‘Every person is a friend you haven’t met yet.’ Working with organizations, schools, community groups, and individuals just like you to connect the world through kindness by promoting positive social and mental wellbeing. 

We do this predominately by providing opportunities for fellow humans to upskill their interpersonal skills by connecting through meaningful conversations with others in their communities. This could look like speaking to a stranger on a train, a colleague at work, a friend at school or someone you might have just seen on the street.

The point is to get outside of your comfort zone and engage with others that you may not usually in a way that has positive intent for our world. What this does not look like is going too far out of your comfort zone into an area we call the ‘danger zone’. The danger zone is putting yourself in situations that feel unsafe. We like to stay as far from there as possible.

Here, I've drawn you a picture;

When practicing your interpersonal skills handing out your cards or connecting organically with strangers we recommend (from A LOT of experience) to keep you in the perfect growth arena and out of the danger zone;

• To always start conversations when you are in public places with lots of people around
• Hand out your cards in a group – a minimum of 2 people so you have someone to enjoy the experience with!
• Trust your instincts! If something doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.
• Do not do anything you don’t feel fully comfortable with
• Be okay with walking away from a conversation at any point
• Do not get into someone’s car unless you know them.
• Don’t go inside someone’s house unless you are really confident it’s going to be okay; you have someone with you and a responsible person knows where you are.
• Do not touch a person you are speaking without permission

These are just some of the ways we recommend there are of course different practices for different people, please do what you need to do for yourself to stay in the perfect growth zone!

People in our world are good. There is SO much abundance and brilliant opportunities for connection just waiting around the corner for you. Get yourself in the growth zone and you will be absolutely amazed at how your life begins to change. 

Check out our Youtube Video for a more in-depth explanation. 
 https://youtu.be/RAB1H60k3pU

- Heather Miller
Social Engineer and Founder 

Feature Photo by Alisa Anton on Unsplash